Brain Times

Just Dead



You want to live forever?

Yeah, the old immortality gig has taken a serious hit. Now that the practical consequences are so readily apparent, people are far less willing to risk sticking around after death.

I mean, it bites. Sorry.

But still...

But still, it's programmed deep within us to yearn for, if not immortality, then recognition. Society was so built for it, social media, cameras everywhere, health devices tracking our vital signs, GPS coordinates... well, it was a hard one to throw off.

And it turns out that it's still doing it. Sure, the persistent deceased aren't winning any heart-beat awards, but on the other hand they never stop walking. And it turns out that if you combine our heart rate trackers, (which we obviously all still have, health is a lifestyle, even though it's a tragically diminishing minority), which are still recording our footsteps and heart-rate, and cross them with all those heart trackers that are recording footsteps and movement... well, you might see how we could record every movement of those ravenous ne'er do-wells.

Thanks guys.

But, no. Thanks to the ever increasing concerns of privacy organisations, we can't actually get at all this data. It's in there, we just can't get at it. I'm sure people try, it's the motherlode after all, but IT has that physical security thing down at least (I've heard there are some sysadmins still trying to keep the internet going).

The one thing we can do, is track events. When a walker does give it up at last, that does automatically sync into their social media. What you might call their EatingFacesBook. And if they stop moving, and one of us (who has opted in) was nearby, it's easy enough to correlate hearts and work out who ceased whom. Which means...

Presenting, your champions

We can work out who's reclaiming this land, biter by biter. With no further delay, I present to you the greatest warriors this land knows. I'll add these stats to all the pages - if you see them, maybe drop them a soda, or a tomato. You know - in recognition. Thanks guys.

Feature: the most dangerous people in the world

Who's stopping the walking dead out there? These guys are.

  1. NotTheDuck with 339 re-deaths.
  2. BluStormFlux with 267 re-deaths.
  3. LordMouse with 172 re-deaths.
  4. Daleth with 11 re-deaths.
  5. AppleUser with 7 re-deaths.

Feature: the deadest people in the world

Who keeps becoming the walking dead, time after time? These guys do.

  1. LordMouse with 14 own deaths.
  2. NotTheDuck with 13 own deaths.
  3. Viat with 9 own deaths.
  4. BluStormFlux with 6 own deaths.
  5. bergen.larsen with 5 own deaths.