Brain Times

Just Dead

The dead are... golly.

Shake on it

Z*****s. No, not those, we don’t use that word for some reason. But, you know. Wowser. Who saw that one coming? None of us took it seriously enough obviously - I don’t even know who I’m talking to. Who I’m writing to - if I'm writing to. Is there anyone out there who can still read? Think? Anyone who figures the apocalypse would be okay, if only the reality TV shows were still on?

With questions like these, why on God’s forsaken Earth am I publishing a newspaper?

I don’t know. At a guess, I feel I have something to prove - all the connectivity, the internet, the movies, especially the video-games - the media was blamed for the dumbing down of society. And now this. Dead returning to life and blah-blah-blah. Again, who saw that one coming?

I mean, all of us obviously - look at the popular TV shows, look at the video games. Don’t give us that “look at all these zombies on their phones” nonsense, humankind has never been overly sociable. Probably because having too many humans in one place, without some sort of strict control over them, has inevitably led to riots. Death. Woodstock. I'll get back to you on this point.

Nothing has changed

Not that you now don’t find humans crowding together - on the contrary. We’ve always been a social species (even if we’re awful at it) and that hasn’t changed. But we’re more careful now. We carry more weapons. We pay more attention to slurred speech.

Overall, nothing has changed though, just the death part doesn’t seem to last as long now. In a strange way, Death not being a lasting condition is a stronger dissuader to causing trouble than permanent death seems to have ever been. Friendships are strong and fierce, if often brief. Trouble now finds you, which seems to have kinda deadened the joy that so many people used find in it.

We are the eye of the storm, surrounded by the hurricane-d flotsam of the dead of the human race. Okay, perhaps we're still prone to dramatics on occasion. But, in general, our habits have been altered, if not really our natures.

We distrust make-up more.

So many parts of previously “modern” society have had to disappear. Perfume… without perfume you can smell a human. In some particular nauseating cases, you can almost taste where they’ve been. Nowadays, perfume is just used to hide the scent of the soon-to-turn, and, more often, the just-turned. It's become a Pavlovian reaction - what was once, no doubt, a gentle and pleasing scent now has the ability to raise that warning hair on your neck. Some perfumes smelt of trouble - now they all do.

On a strange level, the smell of human is more human now. But you’ll find that everything else is a sideshow - once the humans are unleashed, they’re the real trouble.

More next week folks. Or not.


Feature: the most dangerous people in the world

Who's stopping the walking dead out there? These guys are.

  1. NotTheDuck with 339 re-deaths.
  2. BluStormFlux with 267 re-deaths.
  3. LordMouse with 172 re-deaths.
  4. Daleth with 11 re-deaths.
  5. AppleUser with 7 re-deaths.

Feature: the deadest people in the world

Who keeps becoming the walking dead, time after time? These guys do.

  1. LordMouse with 14 own deaths.
  2. NotTheDuck with 13 own deaths.
  3. Viat with 9 own deaths.
  4. BluStormFlux with 6 own deaths.
  5. bergen.larsen with 5 own deaths.